19+ Rude Coffee Mugs for every Morning Occasion

There’s always a good reason to get a new coffee mug, but if you’re looking for one, nobody will say anything if you accidentally break a few you already own. It’s 2020, treat yourself, break your coffee mugs and replace them with better, funny ones. These coffee mugs are the top funniest and rudest mugs that are guaranteed to give you a morning laugh. Who doesn’t need a morning laugh? Buying a rude coffee mug is like buying a piece of art, except the coffee mug lets you have a drink, so it’s already the better option for your home. After a long year, it’s acceptable to laugh, and thankfully, it’s also acceptable to drink plenty of coffee as you do it. Here are some of the best rude coffee mugs available:

Let Me Just Drop Everything and Fix Your Sh*t Mug

This mug goes out to all of the moms who just wanted those few minutes in the morning. All they needed was a few silent minutes to sit and reflect upon their lives, maybe the shopping list, quantum physics, why their husband didn’t put his boots on the mat, whatever. And then it starts, the choir of needs, the “I can’t find it” and the chorus of help, need, and noise. Everyone has wanted to scream it, everyone has thought it, and now you can sip it with this rude coffee mug. Featuring a simple style, it conveys the message and the mood of your exasperation and desire to make it all stop. Do you remember coffee before the kids? No, but you can try, all with the help of this mug.

Have a Nice Day Funny Coffee Mug with Middle Finger on the Bottom

This is the perfect mug for when you just want someone to have a nice day, but somewhere else, far away from you. This rude coffee mug is ideal for those who really have had enough. They just wanted a cup of coffee, they didn’t sign up for anything else. Everyone has had moments where the only appropriate reaction is the single-digit salute, and now this mug makes it easier than ever to complete that. Featuring a black and white design, the point comes across strong. This mug works great, just sip and stare as anyone you don’t want around goes away thanks to the finger design on the bottom of the mug. Not only does it work to make people go away, but if you want them to stay, all you have to do is put the mug down. Though, some mornings that’s easier said than done.

F*ck Offensive Novelty Mug

Sometimes words work like magic and this so happens to feature the strongest word of them all. This mug may look cute but it certainly isn’t suitable for all ages. Don’t let the unicorn fool you, this mug makes no presumptions and pulls out all of the punches. Everyone has felt a similar way, especially if they’d had to deal with in-laws or that one co-worker who never stops talking about his two kids and his vacation home in Miami. Nobody wants to hear it, but nobody will say it either. This mug is the perfect choice for those moments, especially if you work from home, where you can display your annoyance in peace without admonishment.

I Do Not Spew Profanities I Enunciate Them Clearly Like A F Lady Mug

It’s important to be lady-like sometimes and that means speaking clearly, especially when you’re telling someone off. There’s no shortage of life moments that don’t feature some lewd monologue. It’s time for women to rise up and claim their right to profanity, clearly, and maybe with a nice mug of coffee. This rude coffee mug is the perfect choice for those ladies who have had enough. At least those who have had enough of the malarkey, not the coffee, of course, nobody could have enough coffee. This mug gets the point across well with the simple style, and it’s sure to become your favorite mug. Proper speech is important, after all.

Don’t Be A Salty Bitch Novelty Mug

Who doesn’t love a little salt sometimes? Salt makes things taste good, it sits on the tongue well, and it settles easily right down in your food, and in your soul as well if you’re not too careful. This mug is reminiscent of a simpler time, with the classic styling salt logo. But the message is of a modern creed and sometimes we all need a little reminder of. It’s easy to get salt everywhere, and sometimes we need to replace the salt with a little sugar. It’s easy to replace the salt with sugar when you’re putting it in coffee, which this mug happens to hold a hearty 15oz of.

Grumpy Cat Mug I Do What I Want Cat Face

Cats have been worshipped for centuries, and for good reason. Who doesn’t love cats? Well, some people may not, but the internet sure does. This is the perfect mug for anyone who also loves cats but also likes to do exactly what they like when they like. For those who share less spirit with a wolf and more with a cat, this mug is suitable, cute, and funny. This rude coffee mug embodies the free spirit of any cat, or cat person, and does so in a hilarious and rude way. The simple yet adorable design matches the vibe and will match anyone who rather do what they want, no matter how odd, say like using a mug for orange juice instead of coffee. Sort of like that.

Are You In A Bad Mood Novelty Mug

Imagine being asked a question, and imagine the answer to that question being said through art, just like this mug. This rude coffee mug is funny, well made, and offers plenty of personality. Following the internet trend, this mug allows for the perfect answer to anyone who just might be in a bad mood. Besides, if you have to ask, it’s probably pretty evident that you’re not in a very good mood, isn’t it? Silence those who talk at you with this funny office mug. The best question they could ask if you’re ready for a raise, because well, you know how it goes.

Good morning. I see the assassins have failed. Rude Coffee Mug

All of the best things in life are expensive or illegal, and some happen to be both, like hiring assassins to “take care” of your enemies and that one neighbor who always tries to steal your paper. This rude coffee mug is the perfect option for those who wish to convey their slightly murderous spirit over coffee, or maybe even tea. They say tea relaxes you, but so does not having to wake up before 8 am on a Sunday, even if your neighbor with the lawnmower doesn’t think so. This mug is the perfect treat for yourself, your husband, your wife, or that neighbor with the lawnmower and klepto hands. You could stand there, drinking your herbal stress relief tea as they mow, it just may help.

Twunt Because Sometimes Twat And C*nt Just Don’t Cut It Coffee Mug

There are plenty of people who fit into two categories and neither of them is very nice. This rude coffee mug lets them know just that. Whether you use the mug around them, or you gift it in a passive-aggressive yet humorous attempt to rib at them, this mug says it clearly in bold black print. This mug is indeed rude, but it’s also very funny, and unfortunately all too fitting for most people we’re left to deal with every day.

Coffee keeps me going until it is acceptable to drink wine Mug

Wine is cultured, wine is good, wine keeps the crazy at bay unless you have too much of it. Even if you do have too much of it, nobody will remember, you certainly won’t so why would anyone else? This mug is perfect for the person in your life who loves both coffee and wine, maybe that person is even you. That person is probably everyone, but that’s another matter. This mug holds 11oz of coffee, or it could hold 11oz of wine if you still haven’t washed those glasses from last night and have no plans on doing so. Nobody will remember that you didn’t wash your wine glasses, especially if you don’t tell them.

Funny Unicorn Eat a Giant Bag of Dicks Novelty Coffee Mug

We’ve all wanted to tell someone to go eat a bag of dicks, and if you live in Seattle, that’s a compliment. However, for those who don’t live in Seattle and have had the pleasure of a Dick’s Double, they’d probably not take it too nicely. But people are more open to things when you print them on a mug with a unicorn, so you could probably tell them through this mug. They’ll laugh, you’ll laugh, your hatred will boil down into the coffee and nobody will know any better. It’s the perfect way to say what you’ve always wanted to.

Yet, despite the look on my face, you’re still talking Coffee Mugs

Sometimes people can’t pick up facial cues. Some people need extra help to realize when you really just want them to go away. Sometimes they need to read it in black and white, especially early in the morning. Perhaps the best way to do this is with a rude coffee mug like this one. The message is clear and in bold, allowing you to save your words for later when you have the energy and the patience to deal with people who don’t know when to stop talking.

A Wise Man Once Said F*ck This Sh*t and He Lived Happily Ever After Coffee Mug

It’s always best to follow the words of wise men, especially when those words get you out of stuff you don’t want to be involved with. This rude coffee mug conveys the spirit of anyone who has ever just stopped, said to hell with it, and have done exactly what they want to do. Just like wise men, the person drinking from this will have plenty of coffee to get them drinking. And just like the wise men, nobody will know if you happen to put a little whiskey in it too.

Stop Staring At My Cock Mug Coffee Cup

Sometimes it’s hard for people not to stare at an impressive cock. From the way it stands upright, to the fine features and exciting presence. Sometimes, it’s even hard not to imagine what it would taste like. But then it starts making noises and the chicken coop needs cleaning and you’re back on the farm. Of course, for those who don’t live on a farm, this mug may come in handy, depending on how much people stare and what they’re staring at. This rude coffee mug is sure to make anyone cluck up.

Don’t Touch Me Peasant Coffee Mug

Let’s be honest, everyone is a peasant before your morning coffee. Who wants to be bothered so early? And who wants to be bothered at all really? For those who can’t just run off into the woods, fake their death, and change their name, coffee is the next best solution. This mug is perfect for those who have had it with being touched or being bothered. It’s pretty stylish too, and thankfully easy to read, assuming they can.

I’m Not a Gynecologist but I’ll take a look a Sarcastic Novelty Cup


Fellas, and ladies too, who doesn’t like taking a good look every now and then? Who wouldn’t love to take a look multiple times a day, for hours at a time? While that may not be reasonable, sadly, you could still go deep in a cup of hot coffee with this rude coffee mug. It may not be as satisfying, but at least the mug will give you a laugh. Featuring clear text and a capacity of 11oz, this mug is a nice way to start your day, even if it’s not the way you were hoping for. How much does it cost to become a gynecologist again?

This is Probably Vodka Coffee Mug

Nobody is saying that it’s vodka, but it would be alright if it were vodka, and it’s been a long week, a long year, and honestly a very long life, so it’s probably vodka. This rude coffee mug is the perfect for the cheeky person who may or may not be having some vodka at nine in the morning. The mug is stylish and even classy, with flowers and a tasteful font, but not as tasteful as that vodka is.

Eeffoc Is Coffee Spelled Backwards, As I Don’t Give Eeffoc Until I Had My Coffee Coffee Mug

Does anyone really give eeffoc before their coffee? They probably don’t, but you know what is the best way to get some coffee? By using a rude coffee mug just like this one. Many people aren’t really people until they’ve had their coffee, and now it’s easier than ever to say just that. This mug allows you to kill two birds with one stone, you get to drink your coffee, all while telling others around you that you don’t get really care yet.

No One But Sluts are Born On This Day P.S. Happy Birthday Coffee Mug

What says happy birthday more than calling someone a slut? We can’t think of anything better. This rude coffee mug is funny and looks great. Whether the person who gets the cup is a slut for coffee, coffee mugs, or something else, they’re sure to get a laugh at this humorous mug. Or they could get really upset, but you probably shouldn’t talk to them then anyway.

20. UNT Rude Coffee Mug

A little cleverness will go a long way and this mus is the perfect example of clever placement. With this mug, you can insult everyone around you all before noon. Of course, you could argue that you’re not being insulting at all, after all the mug only says UNT right? Maybe they’re imagining an insult, it’s probably because they’re a…what’s the word we’re looking for?

19+ Rude Coffee Mugs for every Morning Occasion
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